Drunk after feeding session (Mabok susu). Valiant is guilty as charged.

This is one of the advantage of being a teacher. You’ll get some creative or more often, funny answers.

PS: As it’s only joke and I have no bad intention of discrediting particular brands, please don’t take this too seriously. Thank you

—
Source:
Fortune Watch

Morpheus: You’re down to the rabbit hole, Neo. The Matrix is simulated reality construct. It is the most advanced Windows program ever developed.

Neo: Wait?! Windows?

Trinity: The Machine runs the Matrix on Windows XP. Subduing the human race while they harvest us for energy. Lean back.

Cypher: I just have to wait for the hourglass to go away. Ok…

(Trinity plugs in cable to the back of Neo’s head. Neo’s shows funny-agony face)

Trinity: Which one of these is the USB?

Morpheus: I think… that one. Er… No, that one

(Neo’s face still looks like shit)

Trinity: Is it the monitor cable or printer cable?

Morpheus: I think they both have screws, right?

(Trinity plugs in the cable. Windows logo flying. Neo is entering the Matrix)

Morpheus: The Matrix used to run pretty well. But it slows down over time. Cypher, Bittorents, a lot of movies.

(Neo stares at woman with red dress)

Morpheus: Freeze.

Morpheus: This was a training exercise. An agent can take the form of any being within the Matrix. So you’re to trust no one. Unfreeze.

(Scene is still freezing..)

Morpheus: Unfreeze!… This happens from time to time! Go on without me.

(Neo walks away from Morpheus. Morpheus shouts with anger)

Morpheus: Try Ctrl Alt Delete!!!

(Neo enters a room. The Oracle is there, preparing cookies.)

Oracle: Well, hello Neo… Hope you have cookies enabled.

(Neo watches a kid bending spoon with his mind. The kid handover the spoon to Neo. Obnoxious Office paperclip shows up)

Office paperclip: It looks like you’re trying to bend the spoon with your mind.

Neo: Yeah, I got it…

Office paperclip: Can I help you with that?

Neo: I said I got it.

Office paperclip: Have u tried realizing the truth that “There is no spoon”?

(Neo pissed off, bending the annoying paperclip with his mind)

Office paperclip: arrgghh…..

(Neo stands up, asking the Oracle)

Neo: Why am I here?

Oracle: Sooner or later we all encounter an error, Neo. You will have to make a choice. To send an error report or… not to send one. But… is there a difference?

(Neo’s phone rings)

Cypher: Neo, it’s Cypher

Neo: Hey Cypher, what’s up.

Cypher: There is an agent on your tail. You need to do exactly as I say, you understand. To your left is a closet. That closet should be full of guns.

(Neo runs to the closet. Opens up and adult DVDs fall down. He picks one and look at the case)

Neo: Amateurs. Wow…

Cypher: I don’t know how those got there.

(Trinity shooks her head in disgust)

(Neo escapes through the window. Agent is waiting in the alley. Agent approaches Neo. Neo reacts by calling Cypher)

Neo: Cypher, I need to learn Kungfu. Now!

Cypher: Our free trial of Kungfu has expired!

(Agent shoots. Spinning bullet in slow-mo (Matrix style) moving straight to Neo. Neo dodges, but in the end it slows down even more. Agent is upset, placing calls)

Voice from Agent’s phone: Data customer support. This is (indistinct)… from Connecticut (Call-waiting music chimes in)

Cypher: Progress bar is moving but the remaining time is going up!

(Agent looks VERY upset. Chases Neo but for some unknown reason, he lefts lots of shadow traces behind him)

Trinity: Oh God, he’s multiplying!

Neo: No… it’s a bug.

(Agent stops running, examining his surroundings. Matrix codes start falling and slowly turns to blue. Windows’ Blue screen of death pops up. Office paperclip flies in)

Office paperclip: Looks like you’re trying to free humanity. Want some help?

(Scene change. Neo wonders)

Neo: Ubuntu? I’m going to learn Ubuntu?

—-
You can download the video with the help of web video downloader. No software required.

Price starts at $20. So call now, don’t delay! More on Lunar International See you on the moon, friends…

Enter “=GAME(“StarWars”)” in any cell and press Enter

The 2nd time you enter the formula, Calc will complain “Oh no, not again!”

2. Meet Calc Developer Team

Enter “=STARCALCTEAM()” in any cell and press Enter

3. Meet Writer Developer Team

Enter “StarWriterTeam” (case sensitive) and press F3.

4. Gort! Klaatu barada nikto! in Firefox 3

Enter “about:robots” as URL in Firefox 3 and let the robots greet us. Just in case, if you’re wondering what Klaatu barada nikto! is.

5. Getting in too deep will void you warranty in Firefox 3

Enter “about:config” and you’ll be warned that it might void your warranty

—
Reference:
1. Free Software Magazine
2. Quick Online Tips

Check out these pictures:

#1, #2, and #3 are from http://loscuatroojos.com A very good site with tons of humor (a smile, guarantee!). #4 is taken from The Week Daily. #5 is from Ndoro Kakung (Forgive me for robbing your picture, Ndoro…)

For malls and groceries? Anyone?

(Harian Analisa – 18/03/2008)

Are students nowadays terribly bad?

Started leaving from Medan at 2.00 and arrive on site round 2.40. There were lots of people (~200) preparing and eating snacks (since it’s FREE food anyone!). Anyway, it was my first run and I’m amused with all the stuff offered. Free flow cold beer (YESSS!) and lemonade, variety chinese snacks, fries, miesop and barbecues. Is it a party or hash event? Who cares? Are we not entertained? (huahuaaa)

Ok, on we go with the run. We’re running up and down the hills in Brastagi tropical forest, don’t know the exact place. It’s very strenuous and killing for some. Quite exhausting if I might say. My wife and I were wearing running shoes which are hell lots of pain. Stuck in the mud and they’re not gripping, we slipped everytime dealing with slopes.

Well actually the fun part of the run is good scenery and fresh air. And eventually dipped your stink shoes full-of-mud in the friendly river to soothe your feet. (Ok, I made this one up)

There are several things I learnt:

1. It’s sports for everyone.
There’s no barrier of age or sex. Even some senior citizens performed better than the youngs.

2. Brain twisting
You dont simply follow the track by examining shredded papers left by ‘hare’. If you get lost (thanks to the misleading sign) then you will stay inside till someone realizes that you’re lost

3. Fresh & cheap local stuffs
It’s fresh and cheap straight from the locals’ farms. Vegetables, eggs and fruits. Very good bargain!

4. It was originated from Malaysia

After 1.5 hours aching feet and exhausted, finally, an asphalt roadside! CHARGE! It’s time to fill my stomach! I can resist the temptation of beer and fries. While enjoying our food there are some show performed by Master wong (ginseng seller) and karaoke. And of course waiting for the lucky draw! There were 14″ TV, blenders, emergency lamps and others.
I might say this is one h*ll experience I’ve had. Little capital investment and all those facilities? I have no complaint whatseover

Care to join?

—
More:
1. Hash House Harriers
2. Medan Hash
3. Interhash 2008 Australia